Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Happy Birthday, Mom


my mom & me - Thanksgiving 2007 or 2006...

From my journal today:
"Happy Birthday, Mom. It still feels like a dream more often than not. It feels like she's still there. I only need to call. I talked to my Mom almost daily and now it's been 10 months since I spoke to her. And that number will only continue to grow. Happy Birthday indeed."

Today starts the long list of January birthdays we have in my family: my youngest son, both my parents, both my sisters, my grandfather (who is also no longer with us - he would have been 96). my niece and my FIL.  Sadly we no longer have Mom here to celebrate with. She would have turned 66 today. She joked last year that she was going to get kicked off Medicare since she spent most of January in the hospital. It wasn't until February that we finally got a diagnosis of leukemia/lymphoma & then she ended up with MRSA in March. Sadly she had no immune system left to fight off that super-bug.

I'm not sure there is anyway to heal from this loss but time so I wait. Each day gets slightly easier but on days like today, it's so very hard. I continue to cling to my all time favorite verse:

"For I know the plans I have for you," 
declares the LORD, 
"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, 
plans to give you hope and a future." 
~Jeremiah 29:11


3 comments:

  1. Praying for you today!

    I also wanted to share a thought my grandma shared this week. Grandpa died last year (a long battle with cancer) and the 1 year anniversary is coming up in May. Grandma calls it Grandpa's new birthday and is celebrating because it is the day he got born into heaven. Can you tell I'm crying? Sometimes I'm in awe of her perspective. I know I'll need to remind myself of it when the day arrives.

    {{{HUGS}}}

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  2. What a wonderful picture of you two. Sorry she can't be here with you, but she's with you in spirit. May God grant you peace and strength.

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  3. What a gift from God to have had such a wonderful mother for so long.

    May the Lord bless you and keep you and make His face to shine upon you.

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Oh thank goodness! I'm not here all alone. Thanks for leaving me a comment. It helps that I'm not always talking to myself. Right? Hello?